Dirty Cane

November 30 2010

I was very good with numbers till I was 15. But when I completed my class 1o exams, I decided to major in computer Science for my higher secondary education. I neither had great love for computers nor did I want to become a computer engineer. Still I wanted to major in computer science for three reasons. I was very bad in drawing and if I had to major in Bio-Maths, I would have had to draw many Biological and zoological diagrams.

By taking computer science elective, I could become a computer science whiz by becoming a world class programmer in cutting edge programming languages like BASIC, PASCAL ( Back in the year 1996, these were hi-5 programming languages indeed)

I could also play mind boggling computer games like Roadrash, Prince of Persia and Lion king. ( Some body would upload these games in the school computers via a floppy diskette). I learnt all the cheat codes in all these games.

There was a problem. The school(SRMHS), where I did my class ten did not have a computer science course for higher secondary education. So I was left with the only option of finding a school where computer science subject was taught. Hence I landed in MCET campus school. It was a new school for me with a new environment.

I was one of the bright lads in my previous school. But in this new place, I was totally out of place. The only saving grace was my love for the subject Mathematics". I was very sure that I could blow away anyone with my number tricks. Shakuntala Devi's puzzles were solved in a jiffy. Yet I never knew the surprise that was waiting for me in this new school. The first week in the new school, all of us tried to garner attention by telling the best possible lies that we could tell our new classmates. I soon had a small crowd around me with my wits. The subjects that I had to encounter in the next two years were announced. They were

English
Tamil ( Though I took Tamil as my second language, The Tamil ma'm was HOT and we tease her when she gave intro to us by asking "mam how should we call you?.... miss, madam, amma or atha....?)
Chemistry ( This was one subject that I was very good at)
Computer Science( Though I did not have a great liking towards this subject, my bro's(SARAVANAN ANNA & Sridhar anna) genius cells were flowing in my veins)
Physics ( Read it as lab games)
Mathematics ( I was the guy to watch out for. I was very confident that there would be no one to beat me on this.)

But I was wrong. The Devil came in the disguise of my mathematics teacher. His name was Mudaliappan. He symbolized all that was evil. He would walk inside the class frowning like a Gorilla. He would always have a cane in his hand. Everyone hated him for that one reason. Yet I believed that I could confuse him with the genius mathematical brain that I had. After the first week, the ice was broken and we had our own gangs. He wants me to sit in the first bench. But because of my gigantic stature, I had to sit in the last bench in class.  Yet I managed it.

Mudaliappan took special interest in my poor bum. He often tested the flexibility of his cane on my bum. On one occasion he caught me singing inside the class. He exercised his cane lashing skills on my bum and I found it hard to sit on the wooden bench for one whole week. Very soon, I developed an Mudaliappan-phobia. He had a very bad habit of making the students answer mathematical formula and when they gave an incorrect answer, his cane would do the talking. I still remember that Friday afternoon class. He suddenly asked me ," Prabhu! Can you tell me what (a+b)^2 is?". His eyes were burning like red coals. He was flexing his cane too. I had a gulp in my throat. My mouth became dry and the mathematical genius in me committed an instant suicide. "Can't you even tell the answer of a simple formula?". I still did not answer. The cane played music on my bum. The girls in the class saw it. They enjoyed it too, because I was the only MALE CHAUVINISTIC PIG in the class.

My friend Bharathi's butt was also pampered to glory. That day , we decided to take revenge on Mudaliaapan sir. Bharathi and I hatched a plan to flick Mudaliaapan's cane. Without the cane, he would only be a half tyrant teacher. He was not effective with the other canes. The cane that he had was so special. It would bend like an elastic wand and when it comes in contact with our rear ends, we would hear jazz music in our ears.
Mudaliaapan sir kept his cane on his bike. The cane was always tied to the side grip of the bike. I and Bharathi went to Mudaliaapan sir's house that night. It was 9 pm. The bike was parked in his front yard. Only the street light was on. His house was locked and the lights inside the house were switched off. I climbed the compound wall and jumped inside, ran to the bike, took the cane and jumped out of compound wall. It all happened in no time. Bharathi was waiting outside on my blue TVS champ bike. We escaped from the scene. Bharathi drived as fast as he could. Our hearts were pounding faster. But soon everything returned to normalcy. I was the most happiest boy in the planet. I broke the wooden cane into two and threw it in a dustbin. I had a peaceful weekend.

After the joyful weekend, I headed to school. Finishing the morning assembly, the school principal (Mr.Krishnasamy ) came forward to give an important announcement. "Prabhu and Bharathi are requested to come to the principal's room". Bharathi literally wet his pants even me too. When we walked to the princi's room , we were greeted by Mudaliappan Sir. He had a brand new cane in his hand. I heard unpleasant non stop music in my ears for ten minutes. At the end of the music session, I was lying on the floor. Bharathi was also in a similar condition.

Moral : If the light inside the house is switched off, it is very difficult to spot people inside the house. But that doesn't mean that people inside the house cannot notice all that is going outside the house.

Latest News: I met Mudaliappan sir after 14 years. He still remembers the incident.

Punch

November 29 2010

This whole week, work is taking its toll on me. So my alter-ego "Mr.Pepsi boy", asked me to take some rest so that he could kickstart his punch-line series.

The punch-line series is officially and unofficially commencing with this post.The readers are adviced to take heed to Mr.Pepsi boy's golden words because he always over flows with knowledge.

Ok here we go... It is Punch-Line time

" Never Run behind a Girl.. You might overtake her"

-Mr.Pepsi boy ( MBBS,M.E,ML,MBA,CA,DCBA,SSLC,Ph.D)

Two Minute Review : Nandhalala

November 28 2010

Mysskin's 'Nandalala' is a movie with artistic features without losing the popular elements.

Though the accusations that he has 'adapted' the theme of Japanese film 'Kikujiro' are quite reasonable, there is no denying the fact that Mysskin has proved yet again that he is a good filmmaker. He has the talent to transfer the emotions on screen across to the audiences - which is something unique.

'Nandalala' is all about two people who are in search of their mothers. Destiny puts them together. They travel through several places to reach their respective destinations.

The journey by Bhaskar (Mysskin), who is mentally disturbed, and Akhilesh (Ashwath Ram), a schoolboy, has been told in a gripping manner.

Their journey turns out to be a revealing experience that changes their lives for the better. Both walk around without knowing the harshness and striking realities of the world around them.

Battered and bruised by many, they also meet some good people who help them a lot. The travel reveals the greatness of human life. Many times hostile people turn out to be good after realising the real position of both of them. Their innocence, helplessness and affection change others too. The scene that shows a physically handicapped person moves the audience. Even the climax is quite emotional and heartening.

Cinematographer Mahesh has done a marvellous work. The visuals are quite amazing. The way he has captured the landscape of Tamil Nadu is excellent.

Ashwath Ram, Mysskin and Snigdha have done their parts very well. Their performances lift the film to another level.

Mysskin, who is known for shaping even the small characters well, has done it again. The characters of the tender coconut seller, granny, maid, policeman, lorry driver and ice cream seller are pleasant to watch. The dialogues are realistic and poignant.

On the flipside, the fact that Mysskin has got inspired from 'Kikujiro' does cast a shadow on the merits of the filmmaker.

Though he has deftly adapted the original to fit into the Tamil milieu, the repetition of the characters like the bald two-member biker gang guys, the farmer and the lorry driver from Kikujiro seems to be too much to digest.

Ilaiyaraaja's music is a huge plus point to the movie. His background score adds immense value to it. The sequence when Mysskin meets his mother and the lullaby that Ilaiyaraaja sings in the background would bring tears to anybody's eyes. Still I 've  my tears.

Despite lacking originality, 'Nandalala' works in a big way with its stunning visuals, music, script and performances.

Am I unlucky?

November 27 2010

100% I am...
I have never been lucky all my life. My stars did not shine as they were supposed to.. When I fell in love with Aishwarya rai , she fell for Abhishek. I went without food for three days. I am not lucky when it comes to riding my bike too. My Victor GX bike is an example and you'll understand what I am trying to convey, if you take a look at my bike. My biking skills reach its pinnacle when I ride it. The dis-oriented shape of my bike is a clear indication of my riding skills. But then man was never destined to be lucky. If that were true, he would have been a woman.

Here are ten reasons why I call myself unlucky

1) I had my first love failure when I was six when my then girlfriend,"Sharmi" went away with  her parents.

2) Two weeks back,I was playing street cricket with some ten year old kids and this girl,"Mouriya"(she is just 9 years), bowled me in the very first ball. My dreams of hitting sixes and fours vanished

3) When I was in school, Mr and Mrs. Crow had targeted my Lunch Box more than a hundred times

4) I never had a girlfriend during my childhood days

5) My 12years love with Anitha ended up in great tragedy. (Apparently Anitha is now happily married with Karthik and they ve one kid)

6) I have scrapped Mr. Orkut, himself. But he never bothered to scrap me back. I guess he thought I was gay.

7) My bro, "Guru"(name not changed cos of cruel intentions), used to sleep on my pillow  and I used to sleep in his pillow.

8) I scored a centum in Physics in my +2 Board exams.(100 out of 200)

9) In Our class(Bsc comp sci) twenty students was rejected in their final project except me.( can u guess why?)

10) If you are wondering why I added point number 7 and 9 in the unlucky list,
7) I have to admit that Guru had an habit of pillow wetting by chewing his finger and spray his saliva.
9) Twenty students did their source code themselves and copied the design phase from me. But I did the design phase myself and copied the source code  from them.

This post is dedicated to my little bro guru.

That blue TVS champ

November 26 2010

I remember those days. A couple of decades back. That blue TVS champ. My dad used to ride it. He was the exact replica of spb (in keladi kanmani), with his leather helmet. I could easily recognise my dad riding down the way even if he was half a mile away. He was never fast nor furious. His maximum speed used to be 30 kmph.

On evenings to the tuition my dad would  drop me and my cousin sarvan on the 50 cc bike. Me and my cousin would fight it out standing in the front. Our fights ranged from simple verbal clashes to biting and pinching. He would be the barrier between me and my cousin on such occasions. My cousin would tickle me from the back and I would retort by pinching his legs.On various occasions, my dad was on the receiving end.

Days went by and we both had a new position in the bike. we was only allowed to sit back to my dad. The bike journeys were always nightmares for my dad as the fight between me and my cousin took new forms.

One day the ever so fighting pair of me and my cousin sarvan, took our war skills to new heights when my father decided that enough was enough. I was made to walk home that day.

On another occasion, I was standing in the front as usual and due to my hyperactiveness, I gave a throttle to the accelerator and hey presto, all three of us were on the ground.

I also remember the time when I had to puncture my soft bum with a TT injection because , my index finger was badly injured.Apparently , my finger had found its way between the break lever.

Yesterday I saw a documentary on old bikes on T.V. , and I was taken back down memory lane.

I miss my dad's blue TVS champ.

Terror Romeo Rajendar

November 25 2010

Disclaimer: The author is not responsible for any fatal injuries attained by the reader while reading (viewing any clips in this post.
Note: If the reader is still alive even after reading the whole post, he/she has attained the strength to tolerate any form of physical/mental torture.
A recent survey was conducted by HSBC - Hot Sexy Babes Committee to find the sexiest man in the world.
 The result of this survey says only one name. Did I mention his name? Those who took pains in checking the subject line would have known his name by now. But for the sake of the uninitiated, I take this opportunity to introduce to all my readers; "The one and only"," Glamorous", " Sexy", "The man with six bags", " The multifaceted" - TERROR ROMEO RAJENDAR

Terror Romeo's Jurassic Portfolio (Otherwise called as Navaratan Poses)-video feed from Indiaglitz

Is not he DROP DEAD GORGEOUS?
If you are still alive even after seeing the Drop Dead video, continue reading...
His birth is a mystery to the greatest scientists everywhere. Just when the scientists were about to lose all hopes in finding the truth behind Terror Romeo's evolution, they happened to watch a program on TV. The program was about the evolution of the Universe. The atheism theories
(i) Inflation Universe Theories
(ii) Big Bang Theory
made them to approach the mystery from a completely different angle. Finally afters years of hard work and research, they found the answer to the mystery and a new name was given to the theory -"Gang Bang Theory".

Only a few people in the world have had the privilege to come out of a movie hall alive after watching a Terror Romeo movie. The author of this post(Pepsiboy) is one among the very few such brave souls. Such is the intensity of all his movies. In almost all his movies, the heroines would crave for our Terror Romeo. They would chase him like a dog chasing a car and finally out of sympathy, Terror Romeo would accept their love proposals.  Recently, Terror Romeo Rajendar went to Mexico for his latest film shoot Oru Thalai Kadhal (Single Head Love). I assure my readers that his Mexican visit has nothing to do with the Swine flu outbreak in Mexico that has spread across the world. Terror Romeo recently entered the Guinness Book of World Records by becoming the only person in this world who could perform as hero, director, camera man, music director, editor, touch up boy, light boy, stunt man, dance master and everything. Answering to reporters about his achievement, he showed his simplicity and his Nationalistic feelings. He also explained the gang bang theory. The gang bang theory is a phenomenon in which a person is delivered via C-section delivery mode where the delivery is done by the person himself.

The iconic figure of Terror Romeo cannot be encapsulated in an ordinary post like this. He is an institution by himself (Please do not ask for any seats in that institution). When I watch his movies I always sit at the edge of the seat because his performances can captivate anyone. He sure leaves a lasting impression in our hearts with his performances. For many, those are the Last impressions in their lives. The one accolade that is still eluding Terror Romeo is the Oscars. I am adding a video of his soul-crunching  terrific romantic performance in one of his super-hit movies. Please watch this video. It brought tear drops to my eyes. If this performance doesn't get him an Oscar, I don't know what will?

Still shocked!

November 24 2010

I have never felt ashamed of anything in my life. I have cried, laughed and exhibited all forms of emotions all these years. But the one emotion "shyness" has never crossed its path with me. My parents were little bit worried when they found that I was indeed growing crazier and crankier by the day and even at night (cause my finger chewing skills grew to new design heights every night.) But that was a long time back. I don't do it anymore.

When I was ten years old, my parents were so much worried, because complaints about me poured from every nook and corner of the town. My school teachers would call my dad to school every alternative day complaining about something or the other. The neighbors fussed a lot too. I wanted to be a Sachin Tendulkar and they blamed me for the broken Windows. I am pretty sure that if I had continued playing cricket, India would have found another Sachin Tendulkar. I did not continue with cricket and hence became "The Prabhupepsi".

One night, my dad and mom were discussing about me. I was in the 7th grade then. I knew that the topic was about me because I couldn't hear their conversation. The next morning my dad came to me and said ," Prabhu! I have something to say to you. Listen! I know you are smart and hence I want to find out your IQ level". Indirectly he was telling me that he was taking me to a psychiatrist. I understood that the IQ thingie was just a spoof. Anyways I got excited with the whole idea because that is gonna be my first meeting with a psychiatrist.

That afternoon, dad, mom and I went to meet the psychiatrist. After a two hour session with him that included various tests the doctor told my dad that I was perfectly alright. My dad could not believe his ears. The IQ level was indeed high and my dad never expected that too. My dad sure started doubting the whole medical system.

Days have gone and nights have flown by; but the craziness is still piling up inside the brain of mine. Sometimes I am happy for it cause it helps me to smile. This blog of mine, I just wanna keep on writing. After twenty years, I will compile everything and print it down as a book and I will surely have a good time. I hope to read this very post in that book too.

Yesterday,I was randomly going through some world news in the Internet. One headline caught my attention. It read,"I am a serious and a shy girl - Julia Roberts". That's when I realised that the psychiatrist was right in his statement about me too.

Now you would surely agree with me when I say that I am the type of guy when some people meet me, they find the answer for the question "Why God doesn't answer some prayers"

Why God doesn't answer some prayers?

November 23 2010

My first prayer was taught by my Mother. The prayer was very simple. It just had six words. It was "Thank God. Save all of us".When I woke up in the morning, I used to say this prayer.The same prayer was said before every meal also.This prayer taught me to Thank God for each and every single thing in life.

When I was Three years old, I remember my first meeting with Doctor. I had never remember seen him before that. Suddenly in a peculiar place a Big creature emerged from behind and started walking towards me with a big injection. I started crying out loud and my parents couldn't control me. My dad told that it was not for me and he will allow me to play with a parrot toy bell if I am quite. But that did not stop me from crying. The Doctor came closer to me and injected me and he gave me a chocolate. Not knowing what to do, I ended up biting his shoulder. Apparently, he happened to be my family Doctor.

Next time, I prayed to God that Doctor should not come along with the Big injection. God answered my prayers. When we went to his clinic he didn't put any injection. He had not forgotten the Love-bite yet.

God answered my prayers...

In fact when I wrote my secondary board examination, I prayed to God that I should get above ninety in at least one of the subjects. I had five subjects in my board examination.When the results came, I looked with eager eyes at my marks in the school notice board.
Science - I didn't score above ninety
History & Geography - Great marks. But not  above ninety
Tamil - Good marks. But not above ninety
English - It was 75 out of 100
Till now I was pretty disappointed . But When I saw the last subject, tear drops welled up my eye lids. God had indeed answered my prayers. I looked around. No one saw it.
Maths - Above ninety. Yes I had scored above ninety at last.
Joy and happiness knew no bounds. I ran around the school premises and yelled out in Joy. Suddenly I stopped running. Some thing in my mind said that I had to take yet another look at the notice board. I came back to the notice board and saw my marks again. It read , Maths - 96 out of 100.

God had answered my prayers. I had scored above ninety in one of the subjects. I realised that I should be very clear when I pray. Talking about unanswered prayers,I prayed continuously for 14 years that Anitha should marry me. She should be my only wife till my last sec.The only prayer I wish for 14 years and I am honest that I never ever prayed anything than this. Finally She got married too. God never answered that prayer of mine.  The same God who answered my prayers more than once did not answer this prayer of mine.

This question will be ever in my mind for many years... No wonder!.
God does not answer certain prayers ......WHY?

Relationships & Senses

November 22 2010

When a friend of mine(Dr.Sruthi, dentist) approached me and said,"Prabhu! Why don't you write an article on your favorite subject-Psychology", I gave much thought to it and finally decided to write one article on the same. After digging my brain for a while, I decided to pen an article on Relationships. This article is embedded with psycho-Analytical statements.I would refrain from using technical language to make this post reader-friendly.

Relationships are built on Trust. So to understand the term-"Relationship", one should exactly have a very clear idea about TRUST.

A couple ended their relationship after loving each other for more than twelve years . When a common friend approached them and asked the reason behind they splitting up their answer was,"we have never understood each other and we don't trust each other any more". So It took 12 years for them to realize it?

Doesn't that sound Strange?
Why do people fall out of trust?
Can we conclude "Lack of Trust" as the reason behind relationship failures?

When such questions arise, we should test our own Senses. Yes! The Five Senses. We all know that the five senses are
1) Sense of Sight
2) Sense of Taste
3) Sense of Hearing
4) Sense of Touch
5) Sense of Smell
These five senses play a very major role in the decision making process of any human being. But can we Trust these five sensory inputs of our physical form? The answer is No. Our senses deceive us every minute.

Deception in sight

Place a stick in a bucket of water. It appears to have a bend,but we know that there is no bend in it.Yes our eyes deceive us.

Deception in Taste

Eat a bar of chocolate or anything sweet & then drink milk or coffee with sugar in it.Our tongue will say that there is no sugar in it.

Deception in Hearing

If we think that we can at least trust our ears, we are complete fools because our ears doesn't pick up millions of radio frequencies.

Deception in Touch

In a physics laboratory we would have done the experiment with hot & cold water.Take two containers of water, one hot & another cold. Place one hand inside hot water and the other hand inside cold water.After 2 minutes reverse your hands.The cold water will appear hot & hot cold.

Deception in Smell

You could even survive without a bath for one whole week. No one around you will know it if you spray perfume all over your body.

Yes our senses are the greatest deceivers

People often say that Trust can be built over a period of Time. But again we can never Trust Time. People often fall out of relationships not because of lack of trust, but because they never understand the value of Relationships. Yes! Self realisation is needed to strengthen a relationship. You either have 100 percent Trust or No Trust. There is nothing in-between in Trust.

A little boy's daily activities...

November 21 2010

When I was a little boy I had to do a daily chore which was stressful. I used to get up at 7 am. As soon as I got out of bed, I used to fold my bedspread myself. Then I would come back to my bedroom and carry the bed-mattress all the way to the storeroom shelf. Carrying a heavy bed was not an easy job at all. Then I would come down,brush my teeth, take a bath, have breakfast, and then rush to school.

This was my daily activity as a child. Everyday I would take a decision that I would not chew my finger anymore. But every morning when I wake up, I would realise that I had failed to abide by my decision. My family tried every method under the sun to stop their son from chewing his finger every night. They did everything to stop. All their efforts went in vain. I am not gonna reveal the last time I chewed my finger as a CHILD. All I can say is that I don't chew my finger anymore. If you are laughing at me, I am sure that you would have done it too. I can hear you saying,"Been there . Done that mate".

Another daily activity of mine was getting punished at school; for not doing the homework, for sticking chewing gum under the table, for hiding my lunch box because I don't like it. My school teacher lacked the creative punishment skills. She either made me to kneel down or made me to hug my own thighs (see picture below)

Another daily activity of mine was stealing mangoes from a house on the way back home from school.There were many mango trees in my house with tasty mangoes. But the taste of a stolen mango was way sweeter than eating mangoes from your own backyard. Now a days when little kids climb our compound wall to steal mangoes from our house, I remember my childhood days and that brings a smile on my face.

Karthigai Deepam

November 21 2010

This is the first year celebrating Karthigai Deepam in our New Home.....I donno why this festival is very close to my heart....great! Wishing you all a happy Karthigai Deepam!

Yoga

November 20 2010

Sachin Tendulkar can sometimes get out on the first ball. Malika Sherawat can surprise people by covering herself fully with some clothes. Jailaitha may stop leaving statements. Terror Romeo may shave his face. Instances like these happen on the rarest of rare occasions. This post is a collection of such instances that has happened in Pepsiboy's life. These include inappropriate thoughts that bloom in his innocent mind during appropriate situations.

You don't realise what you'd got till it is gone.
This is a very wonderful Quote written by a person who must have been through a tough time in his/her relationship. If this quote is used appropriately, it sounds good. But why does this quote come into Pepsiboy's mind every time he when every thing was gone?

Baddha Konasana

I am not cursing my readers in Greek or Latin. Baddha Konasana is a Yoga Pose. This asana is a beneficial pose for easy childbirth and it is strongly advocated for pregnant women. See the picture a model performing Baddha Konasana.

Pepsiboy was forced to do Yoga during his college days because Yoga was a compulsory activity in his curriculum. At first, he hated practising asanas. But when he soon learnt that there are asanas that were according to his liking, he started performing asanas with great interest. Two asanas caught his attention and he would spend one hour performing these two asanas.

Matya Kridasana ( A very complicated Yoga pose) 

Shavasana ( The toughest Yoga pose) 

Soon he mastered these two asanas and became the best Yoga student in college.

Urgently Nurses Needed

November 19 2010

What is exactly wrong with Pepsiboy?
Pepsiboy is suffering from a very dangerous disease called "ambio bonx flu". The symptoms for this disease is not yet known. The cause for this illness is yet to be found. Medical practioners analysed his condition and realised that this acute illness doesn't have any cure through Homeopathy or Allopathy or sabapathy (he is our apartment doc)  medicines. How ever the only form of medicine that can cure this disease is Romanticopathy.

Romanticopathy can be performed only by well trained nurses. The nurses use a treatment methodology called "bio bonxsification" to treat the patient. Concerned nurses who are willing to treat on Pepsiboy can send their bio-data to prabhupepsi@gmail.com . The details will be maintained in high secrecy levels. The Biodate should have the Name, Age, 2 photos (one with make up and ONE WITHOUT MAKEUP) of the applicant. Male Nurses are strongly prohibited from applying for this job

The winning applicant will receive a uniform as shown in the picture. In addition to the Uniform, the nurse will receive a free flight ticket for two to Australia paid at her own expenses. As she would be receiving two flight tickets, it is understood that her accomplice in the trip to Australia would be none other than the author of this blog myself.

Other employee benefits include watching TV along with Pepsiboy and being able to see him using the channel scan button in the remote control with high precision. The nurse would also be allowed to share the couch along with Pepsiboy.

On this day, I would like to wish a wonderful sweetheart Major. Eva Marie Price on her 100th birthday. She turned 100 earlier this year. I realised that she is the oldest nurse living in this earth [link]

The selected employee would also get the opportunity to listen to all the lame jokes of Pepsiboy. She is supposed to laugh at his silly jokes even if she doesn't find them funny. If she is able to cure his disease, Pepsiboy would even dedicate a post for her in this blog. So ladies!Its your time. Get, Set, Go ( I did not ask you to run away)

Note: If I am cured from ambio bonx flu, I promise to write an entertaining post about Facebook.

engounder, bagistan, derrorisds...

November 18 2010

Any resemblance to any politician may or may not be intentional. Still if you think that I have crossed my lines in this post, I would like to warn everyone that I am a close associate of Balls-Talk-Ray.

The following three politicians are like the three lions in the Ashoka Chakra. The Ashoka Chakra is the National Emblem of our country.

1. Jailalitha - Programmed Robot, remotely controlled by sasikala @ kodanadu.

2. T.Rajendar(Terror Romeo) - A loud speaker who was born on Amavaasai (No moon/New moon night).

3. Subramaniam Swamy - Entertainer of the century.

Some of you might act smart and say that the National emblem has four lions. You should remember that the fourth lion is always hidden. If you haven't seen the fourth lion yet, please take a look at the video  below.

This is a mammal and the fourth lion that hides behind the other three lions. Let us call him Gabtun. He is not deaf. He has ear infection and hence he wears headphones. He is an engounder(encounter) not chinna gounder specialisd (specialist). He soots (shoots) Bagisdan (Pakistan) Derrorisds (Terrorists) at will. That is why he is always hiding behind the other three lions.

A ride to eighties

November 17 2010

Note: This post would not change your life. At the same time you do not have to shell out even a single Paisa to read this post. So just go ahead and read the post.

Trivia : Today is 17th November 2010... It has been 20 years.. Apparently 17th November 1990 was the last time I chew my finger.

I was going through an old photograph of me and my cousin karthi. I was pampered big time then. I had a glorious childhood. The games we played those days are still fresh in my memory. I also saw a picture of my nephew and niece (My bro's kids) playing with swing. This triggered me to write this post.

The kid next to me (L) got married last week...so don't forget to wish him

The 1980's were a great boon to children. The amount of creativity displayed by the kids of the 80's were diverse compared to the kids of the present generation.
When I watched the movie Taare Zameen Par, I was reminded of the games that I used to play when I was a kid. We used to invent our own toys from paper, stones, wood, nails, leaves. The level of creativity was on an all time high. I don't see much creativity among the kids of the present generation. Do you disagree? You can use the comment box to bash me .

The advantages of spending your childhood in the 80s
You could lie and get away with it easily. I remember telling my friends that I watched Gavaskar's 175 against Zimbabwe in the 1983 world cup on TV and they bought my story. I have told many lies like this and no one has caught me then. But now some of my childhood friends who have good memory like Vishwanathan Anand would fry me for all those lies.The present day kids find it difficult to lie. If they claim to know something, the other kids can easily cross-check their claim using online search engines. It is very difficult to become the Hero of your gang in this generation unless you are exceptionally talented in lying. Moral : Don't Lie.
The children of the 80's were really good in climbing trees. We also played indoor games which were really good for our brains (Chess, Carrom Board, Hide and seek, Running around the house). We indulged in real-farming. We did not milk any pink cows. Farmville has re-defined the meaning of farming in it's own way. Moral: Climb trees.
Our idea of playing football was to kick the ball in the playground, drink glucose and lime with sugar, getting bruised, fighting with another kid, using slippers as goal posts. The kids of the present generation are really good with PlayStation football. FIFA has spoilt them in a bigger way. I am not asking the kids to stop playing video games. You can play. It is your birth right. But the joy of playing in sand cannot be replaced by joysticks and console. Moral: Go out and play. Get dirty.
Catapult was a part and parcel of every guy of the 80s. We were expert marksmen too. Mangoes and Gooseberries have always been victims. My 7 year old neighbour Jhon tried using a catapult, the other day. He hit himself. Moral: Know your History.
Cricket was the soul of every young guy of the 80s. Every evening from 4pm to 6pm, every single patch of ground would be occupied by a group of boys with dreams of becoming the next Gavaskar of the country. I am not seeing that same craze among the kids of the present generation. Moral: Play gully cricket.
Your folks had much time to spend with you. Evenings were fun filled with visits to your neighbours' homes. You could also go shopping with your folks. But now, where is the time for all that? Moral: Spend time with your family.
This was not written with an intention to make you laugh. So this post would definitely not have the quantum of humor you would have expected from this page these days. But just remember that the author of this page was nostalgic and he came up with this post. If you were born in the 80s, you would relate much with this post.

Doordarshan Memories

November 16 2010

I first saw the television when I was in class one. It was the winter of 1985. I remember two men walking into our house with a big cardboard box. Just like every other five year old, I was curious to know what was inside the box. My imaginations yielded many a thoughts which included sweets, toys, kitchen utensils, wardrobe stuff. Finally when they opened the box and took the brand new TV, I remember jumping up and down, for that was the first time I was seeing a TV from a very close proximity. I turned around and looked at my cousins saravanan and hema akka (hema akka is six years and saravanan is two years older than me . Yes! OLDER than me) and hema akka gave me that know it all look. But it was too late for me to react as I had already shown my enthusiasm. saravanan went near the TV with raised eyebrows (Infact he was also seeing the TV for the first time in his life).

The two guys connected the TV to some wires and did something with an aluminium rod ( My dad later told that it is called as antenna) and finally my mom was called in to switch ON the TV. In the meantime me and my cousins had occupied strategic positions in front of the TV. When the grains appeared,I started clapping. hema akka was keeping her silence as always. She gave a sarcastical smile and that made me to stop clapping. We happily watched the grains for the next two hours and went to Sleep. That was the first program I watched on TV. By the by the name of the TV was BPL(made in India).

We watched TV that whole week and everyday we atleast spent around two hours in front of the TV. The grain show continued. We started counting the grains that appeared on TV. I counted till 864 and gave a smile to hema akka. Again she bowled me over by saying that she counted till 2342. I was amazed at her counting skills. Then one day sundar chitappa(my dad's bro we use to call him FIRE cause he always ve scornful look) did something on the TV and he called that process as "Tuning the TV".He told us that we can watch another program from now on. We were very happy.So the next whole week we had an additional program on our daily schedule.The new program looked like a rainbow. It was a colorful program when compared with the grain show.

I went around and told my friends about the wonderful informative programmes that I was privileged to watch. One day When me and hema akka were watching our favorite program, something weird happened. Some Red color circle started forming in the TV and finally, it ended up like the one in the picture below. Joy and happiness knew no bounds for me and my cousins. hema akka knew how to read and write Hindi. So she read the script in the circular thing and informed me that the new program's name was "Doordarshan". Again she gave me that attitude look and immediately I surrendered. She seemed to me as the epitome of knowledge even she was failed in +1 2 times. Every day we would wait for the red circular thing to appear and we used to sing along with the background tune that accompanied the doordarshan show.

In the days that followed we were treated to load trucks of programs and we had our list of favorite programs too.
On Mondays, we used to watch Oshin.
Tuesday nights were the terror filled nights as I used to get scared of the horror Invisible man.
Wednesday nights remind me of Chitrahaar( An assortium of Hindi film songs).
Thursdays take me back to the memories of Gitanjali Iyer and Shobana Ravi ( I loved both the news readers from the bottom of my true heart and my mom too).
Friday nights rested me with Oliyum oliyum(tamil songs), World this week.
Saturdays and Sundays were fun indeed with movies, Streethawk, Poirot, Heman, Ramayana, World of sports.

Days went by and the my television was polluted with hundreds of new channels and thousands of programs. Every one in our family have different program tastes and we no longer watch one channel continuously for more than fifteen minutes. I still have the BPL TV with me. One powerful lightening blinded it. Soon I ll try to make it work. The same interest with which I used to watch all my favorite programs on doordarshan has ceased to exist. My BPL TV is still in my precious memories.

I wanna sleep maa.....

November 15 2010

These days I sleep as late as 5 am and end up waking up at 8 am. I get only 3 hours of proper sleep. When I was a kid, my parents had a strict rule at home. I should hit the bed at 10 pm. In the morning I would wake up at 7 am. That gave me 9 hours sleep. I hated getting to bed as early as 10 pm and I hated waking up as early as 7 am. My parents would use many methods to wake me up everyday. They used to have a tough time to get me out of bed. Now when I reminisce on those days I also realize that such days would never come back for sure.

Mom's technique to wake me up
“ Prabhu! Get out of bed. It is 7 o clock. You will be late to school”.
“Mommy! Just 5 more minutes”.
“ Get up. You have to iron your school uniform”
“ Mommy! Can you please iron it for me”
After 5 minutes she raises her voice
“ PRABHU! Get out of your bed”
“ ZZZZZzzzzzzZZZzzz”
“Are you sleeping?”
“No Mommy! I am folding my bedsheets”
“ Ok stop lying.” She would then grab my ears and twist it and pull me out of bed.
“Did you chew your finger last night?”
“No mommy! I was just thinking so much last night”
“Aren’t you ashamed to chew your finger? You are ten years old”
“Go and kneel down”
(I really have no clue how kneeling down would stop me from chewing my finger the following night)

Dad’s technique to wake me up

Dad uses the irritating technique to wake me up. It is also called as the “mosquito buzzing in your ear” technique. He would start buzzing in my ear at 6.30 am.
“Prabhu. It is already 7.30 am” ( He would alter the time in the wall clock in my room. I would immediately cross check the time with my wrist-watch which would be under my pillow and the time would be 6.30 am)
“ Paa! You are lying. It is only 6.30. I wanna sleep more”
Every two minutes, he would come and whisper into my ear that it is 7.30 am. His technique worked well.

I miss those days.....

2=3 by Pepsi's Clock theorem

November 14 2010

I was a cult mathematician in college ( Not known to anyone except me). My skills with the number system were far better than the skills processed by great mathematicians like Charles Babbage, Seetharam & Sham (my maths tuition teachers), Pascal, Newton, Bhaskara, Aryabatta, Anuska and Ramanujam.( Dunno how Anuska found her way in this list. But I'll keep her in the list anyways.)

No one could tolerate the ever increasing mathematical brilliance in me and as a result I cleared my first semester discreet mathematics paper after three years.During this course of time, I challenged the Ramanujam Theory once again. I called it the clock Theorem.

Clock Theorem

2=3; because the seconds hand is infact the third hand in the clock

Proof

(in sequence ..

hours hand=first hand,

minutes hand = second hand

and seconds hand = third hand)

so seconds hand= third hand

removing hand from both sides =>

second = third

2=3 hence proved..

Will I reach Cult status in the field of Mathematics.

Mathematical Genius

November 13 2010

Disclaimer: Up on Adarsh request I write this post. This is an inspirational story about me,myself. If you finish reading this you would find the real meaning of your existence in this world.

Back in school, I used to be very bad with numbers. We were taught how to ADD two digits,through the "Finger folding technology ",adopted by my mathematics teacher. My nemesis in School,"Sudarshan", had six fingers in both his hands and thus had the extra advantage and he used to add faster than me. He even used latest cutting edge technologies to sharpen his pencils and thus was always a step ahead of me.

Days went by and I was in class XI (MCET Campus School). I had a mathematics teacher,"Mr. Mudali Appan". He developed a great liking on my compact Bum and he used to pamper my bum with "ruler scales, wooden dusters and cane sticks ". My mathematical skills were so great that I used to kneel down or mostly spend my time outside the class. He was so amazed with my skills with the numerical system, that he presented me with a Book written by Ramanujam and asked me to read it and improve my knowledge with the numbers.

I went home and started reading it and I came across a confusing solution given by Ramanujam for a simple problem. Check his solution here below:

Can U Prove 3=2??

This seems to be an anomaly or whatever u call in mathematics.

It seems, Ramanujam found it but never disclosed it during his life time

and that it has been found from his dairy.

See this illustration:

-6 = -6

9-15 = 4-10

adding 25/4 to both sides:

9-15+(25/4) = 4-10+(25/4 )

Changing the order

9+(25/4)-15 = 4+(25/4)-10

(this is just like : a square + b square - two a b = (a-b)square. )

Here a = 3, b=5/2 for L.H.S and a =2, b=5/2 for R.H.S.

So it can be expressed as follows:

(3-5/2)(3-5/ 2) = (2-5/2)(2-5/ 2)

Taking positive square root on both sides:

3 - 5/2 = 2 - 5/2

3 = 2

The brilliant mathematician who lives within me got infuriated on seeing such a confusing solution for an equation that could have been solved very easily. That night I thought of an alternate solution, and in no time I had the solution to the same problem.

Next day I went to school, Second period bell rang and Mr. Mudali appan came to take the Maths class. Its a combined class for both A and B section students. Where B section is full of girls and all my girl friends Brindha, Kalpana, Rafia, Anupriya, Vishalakshi was sitting in the first row. I announced to every one that I could prove Ramanujam is wrong. "Mr.Mudali appan" did not show any interest. Instead he took his cane to pamper my bum. But who cares!, because I very well knew that I would be the one who would have the last laugh. I saw everyone got tensed because how this nut is going to solve the problem, if I didn't solved the problem. Its a big shame to everyone in my class. I went to the black board(with one hand in my left pocket; a true demonstration of a professional walk")and started solving the problem

To prove

3=2

Proof

Multiplying both sides by zero=>
3x0=2x0

0=0

Hence proved.

After effects
1. My bum was pampered to glory.
2. I never had to attend any more of Mr.Mudali appan's classes.
3. Girls stopped talking with me forever.

Tips for +1 students (Nivedha note it carefully) how to solve tough problems easily.
here goes.....

A Special Wedding Day!

November 12 2010


Birthdays are special for everyone. Wedding days are special for many.  Lot of us have at least one special day in our life that make us happy. Before that I will Introduce My Parents 

Mr.Senior I(Nagarajan) = My dad ( Am not gonna call myself junior. I'd rather call myself Senior II. It would be like king James I,II and so on....). Dad is a businessman and he owns a timber mill and wood stuffs. If You wanna have a great discussion on logs, woods and architects, building houses, we have an In-House consultant in place.

Being a DAD to a NUT is not an easy job(ask my dad). It requires loads of patience, mental strength (physical strength is not needed with cases like me,cos i'd wet my pants with one scornful look itself).

I dedicate five thoughts for that calm man who never ever asked me whether I love him or not.

1) The movie," Thavamai Thavam Irundhu"- I see a Rajkiran in my Dad

2) The tears, I saw in his eyes when I lost everything in my life and love too( God is gracious that I am still alive). That was the first time I saw my dad crying

3) Those days when I used to hold his index finger when we go for our evening walks

4) The hug he gave me when I passed my +2.(That was the best Hug I had got from anyone)

5) The kid-in- him that comes to life when he talk with his siblings.

Lost in 30 years of thoughts with my eyes welled up and a smile (not the nutty smile).

Mrs.Senior(Mythily) = My mother, I would often refer to her as my first God.
Mrs.Senior is not an architect, neither does she build any houses. But still she is a home maker.
It is never easy to handle a son who tests the depth of the water with both feet.
It is very tough to be the Mother of a son who breaks all the windows in the neighborhood
It is almost impossible to put up with a son who asks the weirdest questions one could ever imagine
I know a certain Mother who has been patient with her son over the years.

I remember one incident that happened in our dining room. The father, mother and son were having dinner. Suddenly
Me: Daddy, are insects good to eat?
Father: Have I not told you never to mention such things during meals!
Mother: Why did you say that, Son? Why did you ask the question?
Me: It's because I saw one on daddy's meal, but now it's gone.
I always used to create trouble in school. My teacher wrote a note to my father. It read "Your son has a Fantastic imagination! Unmatched in his capacity for blending fact with fiction. He's definitely one of the biggest liars I have ever met". My father got angry and told to me," Use your lies (SO CALLED CREATIVITY) in some art form and not in real life".
Once I was 8 years old, fell ill and my mom took me to a doctor. We were waiting for our turn to meet the doctor. My mom decided to educate me with some medical terms and asked me few questions
Mom:Do you know what an artery is?
Me: Study of art forms
Mom:No son. That is wrong. (She went on explaining it for a while and I fixes my eyes on a certain man lying unconscious in a bed)
Me: Mom! Why is that man lying down like that?
Mom: He is in a state of coma
Me: Does that mean that he can also be in semicolon, colon, full stop and other punctuation marks too?
My mom just ignored my question. She does that on many occasions. Even today she ignores most of questions. She is celebrating her  Special day today. For the world she might be just yet another women; but for me, she is my world. 

The characters in the picture are:[L-R]  My Father, My Mother, Me.

Note: Bringing up a baby is an experience in itself. Bringing up a nutty baby gives wisdom
The following points are important lessons that my parents learnt in the first five years of my life when they tried to bring me up.
1) A king size water bed holds enough water to fill a house four inches deep.
2) If you pour kerosene on the leather cushion cover and light them with match sticks, they can ignite.
3) A 3-year-old's voice is louder than the priest's voice in a temple.
4) Keep paintbrushes out of reach of children, if you want your television to remain in its original color.
5) You should not throw tennis balls up when the ceiling fan is on. When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a tennis ball a long way
6) Always have wooden windows. Never ever have glass windows.
7) Never ever insert a screw driver inside the electric-power socket.
8) A magnifying glass can burn your feet even on an overcast day. So parents! stay away from your children when they have a magnifying glass in their hands
9) When your three year old is playing with a small bean and if the bean can't be seen, chances are that the bean will be inside the nose or the ears of the child.
10) Chewing gums can also be swallowed.


Coming back to special days today is one such special day for me. In fact today is the most special day in Prabhu's life (so far I never feel like this!). Yes! Today is My Parents 32 wedding day. I was very shy to say it; but today when I told," happy wedding day ma & paa", They gave me an expression-less look. They never expected me to utter those words. The nutty nature in me goes into a pause mode when ever I come across anything that has something to do with a DAD-MOM-SON relationship. Tears rolled down my smiling cheeks this night when I pondered over a few thoughts that came across my mind.
love you ma & paa 

Ahhhaaaa Ithu epdi iruku???

November 11 2010

Two Minute Review : Mynaa

November 10 2010

Super Star Rajinikanth was moved after watching the film ‘Mynaa’. The super star even said that he wish he had been in some scenes of ‘Mynaa’. Read yourself what Thalaivar said...

Things I Love ...

November 10 2010

1) Having a firm handshake. ( But never try it with people who have strong hands like Arnold )

2) Looking at people in the eye. ( In case of unclean eyes, this is not mandatory )

3) Singing in the shower. ( Singing should be accompanied by taking a proper bath )

4) Always accept an outstretched hand. ( You might need a hand someday )

5) Be brave. Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference. ( I live by this mantra )

6) Brush your teeth/Take a bath/Comb Your hair - Daily ( Will such a day ever come? )

7) Lend only those books you never care to see again.( I want my readers digest collection back )

8) When playing games with children, let them win. ( But they never let me win )

9) Be romantic. ( I am always romantic. Ask Anitha or refer to my previous posts )

10) Don't allow the mobile phone to interrupt important moments. It's there for your convenience, not the caller's. ( Please switch it off in a movie hall )

11) When someone hugs you, let them be the first to let go. ( No one hugs me )

12) Be modest. A lot was accomplished before you were born. ( I will have to work on this )

13) Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them. ( Not again )

14) Take charge of your attitude. ( Don't let someone else choose it for you. )

15) Visit friends and relatives when they are in hospital; you need only stay a few minutes. ( Those few minutes might make a world of difference for them )

16) Begin each day with some of your favorite music. ( My room kicks me out of the bed )

17) Once in a while, take the scenic route. ( welcome to Pollachi )

18) Answer the phone with enthusiasm and energy in your voice. Trust me, the person at the other end will feel good... ( Not my Clients )

19) Compliment the meal when you're a guest in someone's home.( Last time when I was served bitter mushroom gravy at my neighbors place, I swallowed it with much difficulty and appreciated the Hosts for a wonderful meal. I was served with the different varieties of the same dish, the next time I went to have dinner with them )

20) Wave at the children on a school bus. ( It is such a wonderful feeling )

21) Smile at strangers. ( This is best booster for your self confidence )

22) A stranger smiling back at you. ( Nothing can beat this )

I am adding three more on a demand made by a regular blog-buddy

23) Laughing till my sides hurt ( You need to have the right company for this)

24) Lying down on the couch and watching a movie on relationships.

25) listening music for hours ( then you would just go on and on... )

I 've a reason to fail

November 9 2010

I first flunked in my class 1 exams,when my answer to the mathematical question 1+1 =1 was not accepted by my class teacher. My explanation that one tiger plus one lion = one tigress was not accepted by her.

Then I failed in urine test when I was in class three. The yello samples landed me in bed for a couple of months with jaundice. I had a royal treatment though.

I twice failed in bike-riding test because the person who conducted the test found me guilty of keeping my foot on the ground while performing the age-old act of tracing an 8 with the bike. Little did he know that reaching the ground with both my legs;that too with a big bike like bullet, was itself an herculine task for me.

The first time I tried knotting a tie, it looked like britney spears's miniskirt.

I have worn a T-shirt inside out for one whole friday at my college with everyone but me noticing it.

The other day during my school days, I tried plugging the both ends of the same wire to the plug board and the whole school did not have power supply for two days.

I tried copying some 25 times in exams all my life and I have never been caught even once.

My greatest failure in my life was my LOVE with ANITHA.

I was so down thinking about all my failures when I came across this poster. Great words from a great man. Such humility is rare to find in the present day scenario.

Now I have a reason to fail and am proud of failing

My Final Interview

November 8 2010

Many among us would have attended the so called demon called Interview. To be honest I liked Interviews right from the very beginning as it gave me the opportunity to blow my own trumpet. It is the only place where no one will walk away when you talk(You might be asked to leave, if the interviewer find you to be over smart). I have a ninety percent failure rate in interviews( Right from Kindergarten till date).

One interesting incident happened in the year 2006. As I knew I ll not be selected, I had my head held high as I stepped foot inside the biggest fish market of South India,"Tidel Park". I was soon sitting along with a group of computer graduates in that small room which accommodated 25 of us. After some conversation with my co-interviewees I figured out that I was the only one who is not a fresher there. I had a chit given to me which read "6". I turned it upside down and it read "9". There was another babe who had a similar problem. The gentleman inside me used his brain and after a two minute talk with her I agreed that I would go in as the 9th person and she could be the 6th person. I knew that I had won her heart. I came back to my seat and saw her through the corner of my eye. She did not look at me. She must have been shy.

People went into the trial room and came back. I was told that it was a stress interview. The girl who went in as number "6", came out crying. I felt sorry for her because I could not offer her my handkerchief to wipe her tears. I had a severe running cold that day and I had already created waves of designs on my handkerchief with my nose blowing skills. With a heavy heart I sat in the room and waited for my turn. Soon the LCD display blinked, "9". I got up from my chair with full confidence and walked into the room. When I opened the room, I saw six people in the room. Three men sitting behind a long table, Two women standing near the window and one guy sweeping the floor. I knew that something was wrong. Anyhow (evalovo interview parthachu itha parkamatama he hehe he he???) this what they call as stress interview.

To make my presence felt, I wished them very loud. To my dismay I found that I started to hiccup at the same time. I ended up wishing them, " Gooiky Onomoining ". All six were looking at me. They sensed that they had their prey of the day. I took my chair and found to my horror that I had left my file in the waiting room. I rushed out of the room without informing them; took my file and ran back inside the room and sat in the chair. I was trembling now. But I tried giving my best smile. But it turned out to be a massacre of sorts.

The massacre began with a gentle question

Stress Interviewer : Hy
Me: Hy
Stress Interviewer: How do you do?
Me: I do it like a normal man. 
Stress Interviewer: I meant, How are you?
Me: I am fine. How about you?
( He did not like me asking a question)
Stress Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.
Me: Should I tell about my family or my school days or my college days or my daily activities or my........, Can you be more precise cos If I start speaking about myself, I am gonna eat up your time for sure.
Stress Interviewer: What is your viewpoint on Micro processors?
( I heard it as Microsoft's process)
Me: They are the manufacturers of  windows 9x, xp, me, Internet explorer and MS office..... 
(The interviewer had a blank expression on his face. He looked at the fellow sitting next to him and he too had this lame expression on his face)
Stress Interviewer: Who is your role model?
Me: I do not have one. Different people influence me in the various roles I play. So the answer to this question depends on the roles I adopt.
Stress Interviewer: Do you have any work experience?
Me: Does loving a girl called Anitha, count as a work experience?
Stress Interviewer: What did you learn from it?
Me: If I wanna marry Anitha first I should get a job.
Stress Interviewer: Is this your first Job interview?
Me: Nope
Stress Interviewer: Why did not Selected in any of your interviews?
Me: Because I could not clear their aptitude tests
Stress Interviewer: Then How come you are attending our interview?
Me: Because your aptitude test was the only one I could clear.
Stress Interviewer: Why do you think that our company is the best.
Me: I never thought so. But Yea! If you select me, I will surely think that way.
Stress Interviewer: What is the difference between love marriage and arranged marriage?
Me: I am acrophobic. So it is almost similar to someone pushing me from the top of the building or me myself jumping down. I know I cannot  pass out of this interview.
Stress Interviewer: Why did you choose the computer industry when You have a business background?
Me: Software, Joystick, Silicon, Amrica, Billgates...everything sounded so nice...
Stress Interviewer: Are you a hard worker?
Me: I hardly work to work hard.
Stress Interviewer: What gives you energy to work?
Me: energy
Stress Interviewer: What are the qualities of a good master?
Me: One who conduct class without making students sleepy.
Stress Interviewer: What is your idea on the peace talks between Lebanon and Syria?
Me: I have no idea
Stress Interviewer: How long are you planning to stay with us?
Me: I have not planned that yet. Should I plan that? How long are you planning to keep me?
( I knew from their facial reactions that they were not liking me asking them questions. )
Stress Interviewer: Where do you see yourself ten years from now?
Me: Be the MD of a computer company may be this too and Interview as you are doing rite now.
Stress Interviewer: Who is our Home minister?
( I did not have a clue about it.. I even forgot our prime minister's name when I entered the hall)
Me: Can I pass this question?
Stress Interviewer: No. Give a wild guess.
Me: George Fernandas?
Stress Interviewer: No
Me: Lallu?
Stress Interviewer: No
Me: Can I now pass this question?
Stress Interviewer: You'll be selected if You answer this question.
Me: P.Chidambaram
(But now he is our home minister. See how my instinct works?!)
Stress Interviewer: Thank you very much. We'll inform you regarding the results of your interview after we discuss amongst ourselves.
Me: Do give me a call after 9 a.m. I'll be busy on the phone before that.
(keep my phone charging and doing the toughest job in the world - sleeping!)
Stress Interviewer: Yes. We'll keep that in mind.
Me: Bye bye ( I told this with an attitude and walked out of the room with confidence oozing out like a volcano that I will never get a job)

I never heard from them again... Hope the questions would be useful for young aspiring candidates who attend interviews. Do not use the same answers as you might end up waiting for a phone call for four long years. For four long years I am under the impression that Chidambaram is our home minister. See my impression works what do you say?

My Prayers

November 7 2010

Dear God,

Thank you for helping me to stay good so far this day.

I have not flirted with anyone today;

I have not given any missed calls to random numbers;

I did not mistakenly mix salt in my  coffee;

I did not press all the buttons inside the lift;

I did not park my bike in the car parking space;

I did not torture anyone with my non-stop talk;

I have not scared even a single child today;

I have not spammed by Sharmi's(gf) mailbox with my forwarded mails;

I did not use my clients phone for my personal use;

I did not hurt any one purposefully;

I did not overspeed on my bike;

I have not switched off my dad's cellphone when he's busy working;

I did not call my friend on his mobile phone( he is on international roaming);

I did not pour water on the neighbor's cat;

But I will be getting out of bed in a minute and I think I need your help then.

- Prabhu Pepsi.