How did he know my name?

June 01 2011

His name was Raja Raman. He was my school mate. He was this typical Village guy who used to come to school with shabby hair style and he even had lice on his hair. His nose would ooze out and he never knew what public etiquette was. Such was his upbringing. But school life slowly changed his approach. When he started moving with school children from different social classes, he soon grasped the good things from everyone. This was evident from his attempt to speak in English. I lost touch with him after school days.

Recently, I attended a social media talk in Cochin where I was treated with wonderful talks by some of the best social-media experts in the world. One Speaker was simply brilliant. He won our hearts with his mastery of the language and the manner in which he carried himself. His name was Roshan. He had long hair and if I could describe him in one word, it would be "Awesome". He interacted with the audience and he even invited some from the audiences on to the stage and used them as props to dramatically explain the examples he used in his speech. Suddenly while he was talking, he looked at me, paused for a moment and said, "Pepsi(ya you pollachi), Come to the stage". I was taken by surprise. "How did he know my name?" I slowly walked to the stage.

"Don't you recognize me Pepsi? I am the same old Raja Raman. I literally got wet in my pants when he said that. What a change? Is this the same guy who was the butt of all jokes in school? We thought that no one could straighten that village boy. I stood there like a statue and memories of Raja Raman flashed across my mind.

Raja Raman would be kneeling down outside the classroom almost everyday, because he would fail to do his homework. He had very low self esteem. He was teased, scorned and we made fun of him for every single reason. He could not speak a single line in English. His hairstyle was pathetic. He never combed his hair. He looked like a golliwog.

After the speech got over, we went out for dinner. He told about the struggles that he went through and the manner in which he was ridiculed in life. His never-say-die spirit took him to the position where he was. I still don't know why he had to change his name to Roshan. But he has his own reasons for that. I am not poking my nose into that.

His circumstances changed him. He had the spirit to fight against all odds. He made an effort to learn. When he did not know the meaning of a word, he had the humility to say ,"I don't know". He is now a social entrepreneur and earning in Millions. His attitude changed and he molded his character; but still now pride has not entered him and I could sense it from his down-to-earth behavior. I became an instant fan of him. Some people can be straightened and they can become great citizens when they put some effort in life.

But there are many mongrels who do not attempt anything in life, but still dream to become Big in no time. One such example is straightening of hair. Kuruvamma, Munimma and Pichamma aspire to become like Kate, Monica and Penelope and some of their aspirations come true too. My friend Shreeja who actually looks like a female version of  Tom Cruise suddenly became beautiful on her wedding day. Her hair was straightened. Only when she opens her mouth to speak, one would realize that there is a doggy behind that beautiful mask.

Guys beware of the Straightening effect. Even monkeys can look beautiful when their hair is straightened. What matters is the character. Don't just blindly fall for the looks.

And another important note is as though you are gonna listen to my advice. Even I am not gonna listen to that advice. The next time, I lay my eyes on a drop dead gorgeous girl, my heart is gonna beat faster too. So just ignore my advice.

Even the Ugly Ducklings can become super-Hot beauties in no time, Thanks to the straightening effect. Beauty parlors are experts in doing makeovers that completely change dogs to beauties in minutes.(Hy! wanna CCD survailance in your parlors....must call only me)  Some of my classmates who are exact replicas of dogs looked so beautiful on their wedding day. The below pair of pictures belong to the same person before and after a make over.

Taylor Swift who broke up with one of the Jonas Brothers because he disagreed to break his vanity pledge, was a very ordinary looking girl. But thanks to hair straightening effect, she has now a few top hits to her name.

Serena Williams was a fast bowler. She had curly hair. But when she Straightened her hair, her attitude changed and she also started playing tennis well. She now balances her tennis- cricket talents. As a Cricketer she plays for the Srilankan national team under a pseudo name called Mallinga.

The below picture is a very classic example of what hair straightening can do to an old lady.