Nilam as Chandramukhi

31 October 2012

Cyclone Nilam is on a rampage in Chennai. The school kids are happy for her because schools are closed. The poor are not happy because Nilam has made things worse for them. Those who live in the pavement are not seen these days. I do not know where they have gone? If you see someone on the road, please give them a shirt to wear.

In the workplace, the tiled floors are filled with mud. The men walk around with wet pants, people sneezing now and then. The atmosphere is not really healthy. The nearby bakery are always occupied. The smoke joints are smokier than ever before. Coffee looks like a divine portion. 

The real faces of many people are unearthed by this cyclone. Girls who apply atleast 1 inch of paint on their faces are unrecognizable. On other days you can even hammer an 1 inch nail on their face without hurting their faces. But on days like this, they look like Chandramukhi Jyothika.
The men walk around with wet pants ; some of them with their pants folded and it looks as though they are walking around in three-fourths. It gives me the feeling that I am in a beach.

When you drive on the road, you get to splash water, mud on the faces of people. Sometimes it is funny and sometimes you feel sorry for them and when you are on the receiving end its not at all funny. This morning I splashed water on many people without any intention to do so. Some of them just did not react and some reacted with some gaalis. Now that I am used to it, I moved on.

When I came to work this morning, I heard my friends telling me that many offices and shops are closed because of the news that Nilam might strike Chennai big time. Suddenly they all turned to my direction and looked at me. Some giggled and Some turned away. I did not know why they all did that. Then my  assistant electrical engineer sent me a text message. When I opened the text message it read "Pull your zip up man". You should have seen my reaction.
I remember pulling my pant zipper up when I got ready this morning. But how did it come down? It must be Cyclone Nilam. Yes! Now I believe that Cyclones can do crazy things.

MY BEST FRIENDS WEDDING.

October 28 2012

Today is the day my best friend got married. Crazy right?! If all weddings are like this I am totally in! Ramesh was the easiest and most laid back groom I've ever been seen. I am so unbelievably happy for Ramesh and Sakthi and I wish them nothing but the best!
For those of you who asked, (more specifically my blog friends who are curious) here was my speech… enjoy

Hi everyone!

First of all I’d like to thank Ramesh and Sakthi for including me and everyone here on their special day; I could not be more thrilled to be here. Also, a special thanks to Senthil for making this all happen.

Three Musketeers 

I’d like to credit his mom, and Ramesh for our friendship. When we were younger and we quickly became friends. Growing up with a best friend who live in your town was easy and allowed for a special bond between the two of us that we still have to this day. I’m sure you can imagine my excitement when my best friend started to date someone who lived a quarter mile from my house.

Some of my favorite childhood memories with Ramesh include crayfish hunting in murder creek, walking to Senthil’s to get our candy cigarettes and 25 cent bullet bags full of our airgun.

But out of all the activities to choose from, one of  Ramesh's favorite things to do was mimicry. He would play multiple voice's. For those of you who knew Ramesh growing up, you know that this is no exaggeration.

Sakthi, I’m sure it comes as no surprise but you make Ramesh the happiest man in the world. I hope you take care of his like he did his family and friends. 

I’d like to toast to the bride and groom – Sakthi and Ramesh, the new Mr. and Mrs. Best romantic couple.

STRIPPING FOR A CAUSE.

October 25 2012

These days it has become a habit to shed clothes for a cause.
If you want to show your support for animals, then take home a pet animal and feed them. Stripping off your clothes and walking around nude does not help the animals in any way. I have often thought why PETA even encourages female models to strip and pose naked? How does that help animals? It only makes lot of young boys and many married men to ogle at these pictures and master the act of bating their desires to glory. (என்ன சொல்ல வரேன்னு புரிது இல்ல ? ஆராய்ச்சி எல்லாம் பண்ணாதிங்க!)

I have not seen men shedding their clothes for animals. If it happens (as in the above picture), would not it help the animals too? Then why aren't men shedding their clothes for animals. Where is the equality concept here? Don't the nudist models go through any puppy shame feelings? 

Another thing I notice these days is the over usage of sexual tones in advertisements. Almost all the body spray ads come with the "If you spray my product over your body, the girls will shed their clothes and run behind you". நம்ம ஊர் boys all will immediately go to the nearest shop, buy an axe deo and spray it all over their body with visualised expectations of what they  had seen on tv. See the print ad from axe deo depicted here. Why is that hand going there? Why would guys spray the deo on the crotches?  The most common place is the back and the armpits. The art directors for such ads have such கிளுகிளுப்பு taste. 
The deos that we buy for approx Rs.100/- are no competition to the perfumes that are in the four digit rates. It is understandable that some sexual tone is given to an ad which places its emphasis on attraction factor. But why does a girl shed her clothes for a toothpaste ad? Beats me completely.

In this article, why am I adding a picture of the muscle flexing Vishal with well oiled body (forgot to take his bath) along with Sembatta hair Nayantara?
Did anyone note that Nayantara also has six packs?
Her six packs will definitely put Vishal's six packs to puppy shame indeed.

IT DOESN'T LOOK GOOD

October 15 2012

Reasons Why I Feel The World Is Doomed

They put pink gunk in our food and assumed it’d be ok with us
Tide detergent is a black market item
Reality TV
Presidential candidates who think and say it’s ok for people to be uneducated
Tebow
My credit score is better than majority of Americans.
Most people are fat but experts can’t explain why.
Yahoo News
Yahoo News Comment section
Facebook
Bradley Cooper was named “Sexiest Man Alive”.
Comedy in movies has been reduced to vomiting scenes.
There’s no excuse to be bored anymore
My Samsung Phone changes my words in text messages to words that humiliate me.

டாய் சாவு கீராக்கி! ( HEY DEATH CUSTOMER)

October 05 2012

Why such a Blog Title? You might ask me. This is one phrase that is so abundantly used in the Chennai roads. Do people actually use the phrase "Death Customer" as a swear word? Yes you should come to Chennai to witness it. All you have to do is, cross the road in Chennai traffic and at least one person will call you a saavu graaki. Why do they say that? Do they practise those lines to use it on you or did they use it just by accident? We can ponder on and on and we will never find an answer to that question.

This morning I was driving my car to work. I had to slow down and stop at the signal because the traffic light indicated that I had to stop. Little did I know that the guy in the bike behind my car was actually taught that Red means Go. He kept on honking and when I did not budge, he got off his bike walked to my car and said "Saavu graaki - Don't you know that I am in a hurry to go to office?" I did not want to react in a equally harsh tone for two reasons.
1) He had a gym -body.
2) I did not want to argue with an immature kid who acted his shoe size and not his age.

I told him " Boss, even I am going to work. You and I don't even know each other. Do we really have to fight over a small issue? I can do one thing. I can move my car a little and you can overtake me and go"

He walked back to his bike and with an angry look overtook my car and jumped the signal like Laard Labak only to be cornered by a traffic police. In the meantime  the green light came and we all drove peacefully with Laard Labak pleading with the police to let him go.

Why do many of us have road rage? What do we get out of it? By swearing at a total stranger just because he overtook you do we get any peace? Do we all think that we are on an F1 track when we drive on the road? Let me not take this post forward as though I am gonna give all a philosophical advice.

How many Saavu Graakis have you come across in your life?

The following pictures shows some Saavu Graakis  we see in day to day life.
Though the above daredevil kind of bike rides are totally unacceptable by the law, such style of riding bikes might become accepted in the future because of rising fuel prices.

Two Minutes Review - BARFI

October 01 2012
It’s a great achievement for a Hindi film about deaf, mute, and autistic characters to not wallow in sympathy or self-pity, let alone pipe a grandiose ‘triumph of the human spirit’ kinda message down our throats. Barfi, a sweet, saline, emotive, evocative, witty, imaginative, heartfelt cinematic delicacy, steers happily clear of these stereotypes and tells us a story that leaves one deeply moved, though not without a few gripes. 
Set in Darjeeling and Kolkata, the story flits about non-linearly from present day to 1976 to 1972 to tell the tale of a mischievous and lively Barfi (Ranbir Kapoor), a deaf-and-mute livewire with always a trick or prank up his sleeve and a local cop (Saurabh Shukla) down his tail. He falls for Shruti (Ileana D’Cruz) already engaged to a handsome hunk in a Kolkatan college and three months away from her wedding. Barfi’s vivacity rubs off on her, but it’s a love story doomed to end in a separation. A family tragedy brings another girl into the picture. Jhilmil (Priyanka Chopra) is an autistic girl from a rich family with an uncaring father and apathetic mom. 

Director Anurag Basu weaves a rather gratuitous kidnapping plot into the story and Barfi is foisted with caring for Jhilmil whom he likes and slowly begins to love without realizing it until she’s taken away from him. Will this love story of Barfi also end in separation?

It’s a sweet, charming, but complex tale told simply and smartly. It’s a story laced with humour and heartache in equal measure, but never does it get glum. Never do Barfi’s silences not speak, never does his self-sacrificing love not bring a tear to your eye, never do his antics fail to bring a smile. A viewer laughs through the tears, and cries between the giggles. Such is the overpowering effect of this marvelous film by Anurag Basu. It’s well-nigh a cinematic masterpiece from a director who knows his craft well. A masterpiece but for the little botch up Basu conjures in the form of a rather garbled sub-plot regarding a kidnapping intrigue in Jhilmil’s family. That’s my only gripe. But it’s a minor one.
Rising to the challenge are the three lead players, Ranbir Kapoor, Priyanka Chopra and Ileana D’Cruz. With Barfi! Ranbir elevates himself to the status of a seasoned actor slipping effortlessly into the skin of the character and giving a performance that simply leaves one stunned. Kudos to him and Priyanka Chopra -- an actress with experimental streak and talent that seldom gets the praise it deserves -- who is unbelievably convincing as the autistic Jhilmil, with her convulsive, erratic body language and a highly expressive face. Kudos also for Ileana D’Cruz for a winsome portrayal of a girl who can’t follow her heart, and when she learns to, it’s too late. Ileana’s is the most impressive Bollywood debut this year, and it would be a shame if she’s ignored at the awards.

Last but not the least, kudos to Anurag Basu for a film that’s honest, wonderful, well-written, superbly directed and with a music (Pritam) one won’t forget in a hurry. It’s a story coming straight from the heart and goes straight to the heart. A connect most potent in any form of storytelling.