July 25 2017
This is a sequel type post which ll be explained #1, 2, 3, ...
I bet my wife 'my friends are always better than yours!'
Same conclusion every time.....and I bet few of my friends are smiling now recalling the circumstance....
I was not at home for a whole night. So I told to my wife the next morning, that I stayed at my friend sudhakar's apartment overnight.
My wife knows he is a teetotaller.
Though I was caught red handedly.
She was damn sure that I am lying & I am not at sudhakar's apartment last night.
I replied no dear I didn't lie & I am sure.... if don't believe me you just call sudhakar and ask.
She replied 'no dear without calling him I can find that' saying this she took my phone and calls 6 of my best friends: 3 of them confirmed that I stayed at their apartments that night, and the other 3 are claiming that I was still there with them!
That whole week I was sleeping alone in my terrace.
Conclusion : My friends are better than her's ! ! !
July 24 2017
Last month I called shades (a weight loss company like colors) and orders their 3-day/10 lb. weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before me a voluptuous, athletic, 24 year old babe dressed in sleeve less t-shirt with mini frock & a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.
She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can date me."
Without a second thought, I takes off after her.
A few miles later huffing and puffing, I finally gives up.
The same girl shows up for the next two days and the same thing happens.
On the third day, I weighs myself and I delighted that I had lost 10 lbs. as promised.
Again I called the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.
The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning and beautiful woman I had ever seen in my life.
This time she is wearing a thong and a Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me." Well, next sec I am out of the door after her like a shot.
This girl is in excellent shape and I did my best, but no such luck.
So for the next four days, the same routine happens with me gradually getting in better and better shape.
Much to my surprise delight on the fifth day when I weighs myself, I discovers that I had lost another 20 lbs. as promised.
Atlast I decided to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program. "Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. And he also told me in a serious note "This is our most rigorous program."
"Absolutely," I replied that, "I haven't felt this good in years."
The next day there's a knock at the door; and when I opened it................ I found a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads,"If I catch you, you are mine!!!"
Atlast I lost 60 pounds that week.
This is the secret of my weight loss.
Note: If you are also interested feel free to ask me, I am sure I ll give you the contact details!
July 23 2017
This is strange...can you
Are you the 2% or 98% of the population?
Follow the instructions! NO PEEKING AHEAD!
* Do the following exercise, guaranteed to raise an eyebrow.
* There's no trick or surprise.
* Just follow these instructions, and answer the questions one at a time and as quickly as you can!
* Again, as quickly as you can but don't advance until you've done each of them ... really.
* Now, scroll down (but not too fast, you might miss something.)
Think of a number from 1 to 10
Multiply that number by 9
If the number is a 2-digit number, add the digits together
Now subtract 5
Determine which letter in the alphabet corresponds to the number you ended up with
(example: 1=a, 2=b, 3=c,etc.)
Think of a country that starts with that letter.
Remember the last letter of the name of that country.
Think of the name of an animal that starts with that letter.
Remember the last letter in the name of that animal.
Think of the name of a fruit that starts with that letter.
Are you thinking of a Kangaroo in Denmark eating an Orange ?
I told you this was FREAKY!! If not, you're among the 2% of the population whose minds are different enough to think of something else. 98% of people will answer with kangaroos in Denmark when given this exercise.
July 05 2017
Some things in life should be believed without questioning!
When I don’t rise up to my family expected standards, My Mom used tell me the story of the Chinese bamboo tree.
Do you know how a Chinese Bamboo tree grows?
The process goes like this: You take a little seed of the bamboo tree, plant it, water it, and fertilize it for a whole year, and nothing happens. The second year you water it and fertilize it, and nothing happens. The third year you water it and fertilize it, and nothing happens. How discouraging this becomes! The fifth year you continue to water and fertilize the seed and then sometime... During the fifth year, the Chinese bamboo tree, sprouts and grows NINETY FEET IN SIX WEEKS.
Incredible or what?
Likewise they try and try and try to drill some sense into me, but somehow they don’t produce any result about me. Myself, I just want to have fun in life, & can’t seem to concentrate on what should be a priority in that point of time in my life.
However, it doesn’t stop my family & especially my perrima, mom & wify from wishing that one day… just maybe ONE DAY, I would be like the bamboo tree and I will shoot up ninety feet in the air.
Not literally. But you know what they mean.
I am the one WHOLE a lot to my family & for my perrima, mom & wify, more than they can say. That too my perrima & mom have watched me grow from tiny little kid into strapping man. My wify Strongly believe that she can change me totally. They hope with all their heart that eventually I will become fine & wise men, admired by many, many people.
And at last I sprouts and started growing after 36 years
They three are like the persons who has planted this Chinese Bamboo Tree!
July 04 2017
Row L-R: Mahalingam, Praveen(Nurse Nimmy), Krishna, Mathew(Doctor), Me(Green shirt dress changed), Suresh & Ravi (Krishna's wife Radha) .
This was the skit crew during my 10th standard (1996). When everyone were busy preparing for their public exams, we were busy practicing for a skit performance for our annual day function.
The Story: Krishna goes to a doctor with a problem in his tummy. The doctor finds out that he needs a kidney transplant. As no one comes forward to donate a kidney to him, the doctor decides to take his dog's kidney and perform a transplant for Krishna. I was the dog. We had a glamorous nurse (Praveen) in the play too. Everyone would try to hit on her. But no one would get her. In the end, Krishna would turn into a dog and behave like a dog.
Yes, that was our story. That was the epic marana mokka script that we came up with and we had double en tender throughout the script.
I seriously have no idea how Suresh became a part of the script. He just wanted to be around Praveen all the time and hence he was roped into the team. Suresh acted as a patient suffering from cough. The doctor would write "vicks" on a piece of paper and hand it over to Suresh. Suresh would eat it and leave the place.
This scene was later introduced in a tamil movie " Pennin Manathai thottu". Our mokkai jokes were copied in mainline cinema too.
I was selected as the dog, because I could bark well, and behave like a dog too. I would jump up and down everywhere, wag my butt and even lift my legs to pee. I was a male dog and not a bitch.
How ever the main attraction of the skit was Praveen. To add glamour to his image, we placed balloons inside his shirt to boost his self confidence. On the day of the event, Suresh pricked the balloon just before we entered the stage. Praveen's glamour quotient went down by a large margin. Immediately Krishna gave two coconut shells to Praveen and Praveen became more glamorous than before. His onstage name was Nurse Nimmy. Our classmate Hafeesa gave voice for Praveen from backstage.
The skit was supposed to end with Krishna barking like a dog and leaving the stage. We practiced it to perfection. But Krishna had other ideas. Before entering the stage, he strategically placed a water bottle and a straw in his pants and he decided to raise his legs and at the same time press the bottle so as to make it appear as though he is peeing at the audience. Unfortunately on that day, our Principal was sitting in the front row and he was subjected to water abhishegam.