April 27 2010
What if no one cares? WHAT THE F*** WILL THAT MEAN? What have I been living for? What is really keeping me alive? Is there someone in this world that I am living for? Must I always find out the hard way and suffer other people’s consequences? There is no relief. This world offers none. There is no meaning to the actions I do. My intent is unknown to myself. Everyone matters. I am not everyone. I am the imbalance of neglect. I am the F***ING IMBALANCE OF NEGLECT.
Why is it that when I am alone, I feel too lonely, and when I am with other people, I want to be alone? Why is there such an imbalance? Is it me? I bet it is. I am neglected, and I am the reason for it. I am the source of the lies that I live and that others believe. I am the imbalance of neglect.
Why am I alive?
When will it end? My heart hurts. My eyes thirst. My mind has lost motivation. When will it end? When can I finally just die?
Is my desire for death genuine? Can anyone give me an answer to that? I cannot imagine myself in the future anymore. I have stopped dreaming completely for what my future might hold. There is nothing to dream for, and there is nothing to live for. Why is everything so artificial?
1 comment:
Why do you bother? It’ll all be over within a month max.
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