A Visit to Side-effect City

December 31st, 2008

Another short time at home, another short post. Sometimes I don't know why I keep going back to the hospital.

I can feel energy rising a little. And in some ways I'm glad, even while it scares me. Last week's sleeper overdose zonked me out for a few days, had a brief flicker of energy on Saturday, and some blissful visions on Sunday, then the new drugs started kicking in. I've been drowsy and dizzy and have had to move slowly and carefully everywhere so as not to black out. I've been doing some serious sleeping. I also keep thinking I am somewhere else, a foreign city somewhere., but disturbingly persistent.

My therapy session on Monday was immensely powerful. I do mean to write about it, and about my experiences of therapy in general. This current therapist is very real and very human and interacts with me as such, rather than from an intellectual theoretical standpoint. I almost wish she didn't, because it seems it would then be much easier just to give up this whole living thing.

Enough. Back to the home for meds and bed.
In spite of that Happy New Year to everyone and all the best for the 2009.