Funny school days...

March 22 2010

TEACHER : Why are you late?
STUDENT : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
STUDENT : The one that says, “School Ahead, Go Slow.”
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TEACHER : STUDENT, why are you doing your math sums on the floor?
STUDENT : You told me to do it without using tables!
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TEACHER : STUDENT, how do you spell “crocodile”?
STUDENT : “K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L”
TEACHER : No, that’s wrong
STUDENT : Maybe it’s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
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TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
STUDENT : “HIJKLMNO”!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
STUDENT : Yesterday you said it’s H to O!
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TEACHER : STUDENT, go to the map and find North America.
STUDENT : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
CLASS : STUDENT!
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TEACHER : STUDENT, name ! one important thing we have today that we
didn’t have ten years ago.
STUDENT : Me!
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TEACHER : STUDENT, why do you always get so dirty?
STUDENT : Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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STUDENT : Dad, can you write in the dark?
FATHER : I think so. What do you want me to write?
STUDENT : Your name on this report card.
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TEACHER : How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
STUDENT : Don’t bite any.
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TEACHER : STUDENT, give me a sentence starting with “I”.
STUDENT : I is…
TEACHER : No, STUDENT. Always say, “I am.”
STUDENT : All rig! ht… “I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.”
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TEACHER : “Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?”
STUDENT : “Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day,
same time.”
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TEACHER : “George Washington not only chopped down his father’s
Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why
his ! father didn’t punish him?”
STUDENT : “Because George still had the axe in his hand?”
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STUDENT : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
FATHER : No. Why do you ask that?
STUDENT : Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?
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TEACHER : STUDENT, your composition on “My Dog” is exactly the
same as your brother’s. Did you copy his?
STUDENT : No, teacher, it’s the same dog!
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TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people
are no longer interested?
STUDENT : A teacher